Women’s Empowerment: Confessions of a How-a-holic

social media tips confessions of a how-a-holic

Women’s empowerment among women entrepreneurs is a movement making waves in society and business today.

“The ladder of success is best climbed by stepping on the rungs of opportunity.” – Ayn Rand

At a Have It All Women’s Weekend, which is a women’s empowerment group I mentor, one of the exercises I did was guide the participants through a goal-getting exercise designed to assist them with becoming more focused and productive.

Throughout the entire weekend, we had been setting goals, particularly ones that would cause the women to stretch and stretch again.  During this particular exercise, the women were asked to choose their three top production goals and three top lifestyle or well-being goals.

Inevitably, during this exercise women would ask me how they were supposed to find the time?  Or how they were going to accomplish a goal?  Or how they could narrow their focus down to just a few goals?

The true secret to women’s empowerment…

It was in this moment I declared, “It is time to stop being a how-a-holic and trusting that the moment you decide what it is you want, you focus in, roll up your sleeves with faith and sweat equity, the ‘how’ will be revealed.”

Many people are ‘how-a-holics.’  They have to know how something is going to happen or how something works before they even get started in pursuing their dreams and goals.  Jeffery Combs, a dear friend and procrastination expert, deems this term, ‘getting ready to get ready.’  In other words, the vast majority of people spend more time thinking about how something is going to happen than actually making it happen.

hoops

Another friend of mine, Brendan Steiner, who helped broker the Jeremy Lin deal for the New York Knicks, told the story of how he was able to get Lin to New York.  He wasn’t sure how he was going to do it, but what he did know was that he was determined to do it.  Several NBA team wanted Lin.  Steiner was among dozens of people calling Lin’s agent to get his attention.  Steiner made fifty phone calls in a span of twenty hours.

On the last call, Steiner offered to help Lin’s agent find the best deal.  He knew that the agent was young and could use the help.  Steiner didn’t know how he was going to assist exactly, but he knew that he could.  The agent was taken aback by his willingness to help, and thanks to Steiner’s persistence and offer of contribution, Lin ended up in New York.

For many years my husband and I dreamed of one day working from home, earning professional salaries, and being there to raise our kids.  We didn’t know how it would happen; seriously – how many people in their thirties get to stay at home and earn a seven figure income?  Thank goodness we had a goal and were open to possibilities.  Our home-based business allowed us to live into the family we always knew we could be.

opportunity

We do not always have to know how something is going to happen.  What is required is getting ourselves in the game and going for it.  Sitting back and over-thinking will often cause us to miss opportunities and prevent us from achieving what it is we really want.  If you find yourself spending more time thinking than actually doing, then chances are you are afraid of failure.  The only way to overcome this is to take action; you will soon realize that the pain associated with lack of action and missed opportunities is much greater than the fear of taking action.

I encourage you to act.  Let go of the ‘how’ and focus on the ‘what.’  You are born with greatness inside you, and you can truly create the life of your dreams.  Go for it like never before and know that I believe in you.

Susan’s Tips for Releasing Your ‘How-A-Holic.’

  1. Decide The What.  Take ten minutes and write out as many goals as possible.  Divide the goals into two categories – production and lifestyle.  Any goal that has something to do with money and money management is a production goal.  If you are looking to advance your career, create more income, or increase your skills, these all go under ‘production.’  Anything to do with health, family or overall well-being go under ‘lifestyle.’  Now, narrow these down to the three top goals in each category for a total of six.  It is important to try to keep it to six or less, or the risk of overwhelm could become a factor.
  2. Decide The Why.  Ask yourself why these goals are important.  Ask yourself who else benefits when you achieve these goals.  You want to increase your level of desire as well as your level of commitment to obtaining of the goals.
  3. Decide The When.  Schedule out at least one hour per day to work solely on each category of goals.  For example if one of your goals is to release weight, set aside an hour for exercise.  If a goal is to increase your income, then set aside an hour each day for contacting new clients, looking for a new job, or increasing your current revenue stream.  More hours do not necessarily guarantee more results.  It is what you do in these hours that counts.
  4. Let Go of The How.  From experience I can tell you that once you start pursuing your goals the right people and the right circumstances show up.  In Malcolm Gladwell’s book, The Tipping Point, he shares that although the most successful people on the planet have put in at least 10,000 hours to master their craft, he also points out that while they are taking action, a ‘lucky’ break occurs — either they meet the right people or happen to be in the right place at the right time.  Is it just dumb luck?  Perhaps.  But my take on it is that these people are sending a clear message that they are ready for prosperity, and in turn, they are rewarded.

Susan Sly work life balance and time management tipsSusan Sly is a best selling author, speaker and entrepreneur. She has appeared on CNN, CNBC, Fox, Lifetime Television and the CBN. Susan is the mother of five children and resides in Scottsdale, Arizona.

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